Agencies On Notice. They Will Never Learn. Buy Low, Sell High. 4 Tons Of Fun.

S$5 Million For 30 Seconds. It Is A Mammal.  The Model Does Work.  Watch the Video.

A bit over $5 million for a 30-second spot. That is the going rate for what many feel are their favorite part of watching the Super Bowl – the commercials. Lets hope that the creative content of these $5M ad spots makes us laugh, delivers a solid message, and keeps us engaged.

Many years ago as a youngster growing up in Miami, I remember a criminal case that at first I did not understand. The Coast Guard, on routine patrol in Biscayne Bay, spotted a fisherman shooting into the water. The Coast Guard closed in and the fishing boat attempted to escape, obviously to no avail. Upon boarding the vessel, the Coast Guard arrested the captain and charged him with killing two dolphins, illegal then and illegal to this day. I was told by friends that killing dolphins was a trophy kill for many fishermen, able to sell them on the “black” market. Unfortunately for this fisherman, or maybe fortunately, he was arraigned on killing a endangered specie – and then faced a Miami circuit court judge who many criminals in Miami feared. I don’t recall his name, but I do remember the judge looked old, acted old, but was known for being the ‘iron fist’ of sentencing. The judge sentenced the fisherman to fifteen years, with no opportunity for parole. The courtroom was shocked until the judge explained his sentence: all fishermen were warned for many years, previous fines and prison sentences had been handed down to others for killing dolphins, and then his statement that hammered home his anger: Dolphins are mammals…they breathe air using lungs, not gills, and they bear live young. He continued that baby dolphins drink milk and have hair, and as a protected specie, and a mammal, he told the fisherman that he was lucky not to be sentenced under the guidelines of pre-meditated murder. Obviously the media had a field day with this ruling and some of the public was outraged. I don’t remember if the sentencing was reduced on appeal, but I do remember that the harassing and killing of dolphins in Biscayne Bay came to a full stop. Unfortunately, some people never learn. Recently, a Texas court sentenced two brothers charged with the killing of a bottle nose dolphin, found dead from a hunting arrow wound near the Louisiana border in the Gulf of Mexico. The perpetrators, who were found guilty to the killing incident in February of last year, were sentenced to two years in federal prison and a $50,000 fine. Similar to the elephant seal moron, you can’t fix stupid.

Not many people outside of South America had ever heard of Miguel Almiron. Pundits were a bit surprised when Atlanta United bought Almiron from Lanus in Argentina for a reportedly $8M. Almiron, under the guidance of manager Gerardo Martino (Tata), went on to be one of the top players in Major League Soccer during his two-year stint in Atlanta. Almiron’s pace, technical ability, and incredible work rate gained notice from many European clubs. Earlier this week, Newcastle United bought Almiron for $27M, yielding a return on investment of 2.5x (not 3x as some of the allocations go to the MLS, etc.) Once again, the magical and hard working staff of Atlanta United, under the tutelage of owner Arthur Blank, have set a massive precedent for Major League Soccer. Kudos to Darren Eales and Carlos Bocanegra, who not only positioned the sale of Almiron, but convinced the South American Player of the Year, Pity Martinez, to sign with the Club to help fill the void of Almiron’s departure. Atlanta United has a massive task at hand after being crowned MLS champions in their second year, but you can only think that their opponents will again frown upon having to deal with Josef Martinez, Tito Villalba, Ezequiel Barco, and the new acquisition, Pity Martinez.

La La land. California beach goers , especially one individual, have voiced there concerns and displeasure with having to give up one of “their” beaches. While seals can be found on many California beaches, the temporary government shutdown opened the door for hundreds of seals, including elephant seals, to take over a beach usually reserved for humans. With government workers on temporary sabbatical, there was no one to maintain this one beach usually inhabited by humans. So the seals, led by the massive elephant seals, decided to take over the beach to to displeasure of stupid humans. The stupid humans quickly forget that the coastline and the beaches are the habitat of many sea species, including thousands of seals. One individual protested by trying to make the seals leave the beach and go back into the water. Yes, park rangers quickly removed the man from the beach – for his own protection. Elephant seals can weigh four tons and reach a length of 20′. The man removed from the beach should be very thankful. See below.

Daylight savings time countdown: six weeks from today.

Adios and Have a Fun Superbowl Sunday!!!

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