The Sunday Cynic – v.2

You Must Be Kidding Me?

It is reported that Florida’s Governor, Rick Scott, has decided to close all lanes of Florida’s turnpike and I-75 to generate additional state revenue from tow truck fees.  Editor’s note: my drive last Thursday from Orlando to Atlanta lasted a mere FOURTEEN hours for what is usually less than a seven hour drive.  You could count on one hand the number of cars coming south…..you have to be a pure idiot not to open up southbound lanes for northbound traffic when an emergency evacuation is declared.  This Governor must be past the point of stupid.

Tom Brady is reportedly still crying in his crib due to Thursday night’s performance in the NFL season-opener.  His wife, not ever wanting to get her hands dirty, still refuses to change his diaper.

An arbitrator has been called in to decide what false news to allow to be broadcast by the crack weather reporters on all the news channels, including The Weather Channel.  Their drama will unfortunately continue this week as Hurricane Jose is tracking a very bad path behind Irma.

Kim Kardashian was rescued at the NY Fashion Awards ceremony.  Thinking the venue’s dumb-waiter was a small elevator, her Mack truck-sized ass got stuck between the doors upon her effort to exit.  Interesting how I can make fun of a non-talent bringing in close to $90m in income.

Sources close to the organization tell me that the Atlanta Braves may be promoted to Major League Baseball from Triple A next year.

The Mayo Clinic recently reported that sleeping with your DOG may yield a better night’s sleep.  Yes, the Mayo Clinic, renowned as one of the best healthcare facilities in the world, has spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on this study.  Perfect.

On a serious note:  Have you donated to the Red Cross?  Go to the Red Cross website – it takes less than five minutes to populate the form.  Just do it.

Adios and all the best for a safe Sunday and week – thoughts and prayers to the people of South Florida, Texas and Mexico.

 

 

32 thoughts on “The Sunday Cynic – v.2”

  1. Your note about the non-talent of Kim K. is incorrect. This girl and her mom (and family) are extremely talented in understanding how dumb the American (and worldwide for that matter) TV audience is…. making 90 Million a year, having the majority of butt augmentation plastic surgeries modeled after hers is incredibly talented… Adios.

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